


It's Not Cool Being Sick

by Vodka112



Series: TimKon Collection [3]
Category: DCU (Comics), Teen Titans (Comics)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-29
Updated: 2016-02-29
Packaged: 2018-05-23 23:16:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,161
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6133477
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vodka112/pseuds/Vodka112
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tim doesn't eat cheeseburgers anymore and Kon feels very strongly about that. WIP</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's Not Cool Being Sick

**Author's Note:**

  * For [hummingfox](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hummingfox/gifts).



> In this universe, Cassandra Cain is Nightwing. Dick Grayson is busy being Batman 2.0 but is very interested in how the Titans' training is coming along. Otherwise, assume Pre-52. Also, I edited some details. WIP (STILL OMGOD)

"...and I told him, 'Get doing or get lost!' Then, get this, the hen poops on his hand. Like, right on his cuffs!"

Red Robin scowls at Superboy. He finishes his arch through the air and lands on the roof. Superboy floats down next to him and rubs his elbow against his side.

"Hey, it was a funny story, okay? Who pissed in your Zesti?" Superboy says.

"Scarecrow. For the third time this month," Red Robin answers. Superboy blinks at him.

"Dude, really?" Superboy asks.

"No. It would've been fine if he did. Gotham's water filtering system is topnotch. He overloaded the filters with his new fear compound and Wayne Industries is still in the process of making new ones," Red Robin says. He runs and jumps to the next building. He fires the grappling hook up and vaults his body over the edge of that building when he reaches mid-arch. Superboy easily keeps up with him.

They end up on top of a radio station. Three spires grow from its roof. Tim leans against one of the spires. He crosses his arms and narrows his eyes at Kon.

"I know I haven't shown up at the Tower for a while, but that's no excuse to hunt me down," Tim says.

"Yes. Yes, it is," Kon says. He steps into Tim's personal space. His chest is pressing against Tim's crossed arms. Tim's glare softens when Kon's hands rub his arms and settle on his sides.

"How are you doing?" Kon says.

"Well. You?" Tim says.

"So-so. I'd be better if you join the Teen Titans' Training Camp this Friday," Kon says. His mouth is twisted in a smirk as he rubs his thumbs in circles on Tim's waist. Tim snorts as he tugs Kon's hands away but he doesn't let go.

"You mean that glorified weekend in Hawai'i?" Tim says. He laces his fingers with Kon's. Kon flashes him a bright smile.

"Don't knock on it," Kon says, with all fake hurt and defensive pride, "Hawai'i can give you a run for your money."

"I would know. Poison Ivy--," Tim starts but Kon cuts him off.

"Ugh, you'll never let that go, will you?" Kon groans. Tim smirks.

"I'll think about it," Tim says. He lets go and faces the west end of the city. Kon catches his wrist.

"Wanna get some cheeseburgers? I saw some on the way here," Kon asks. Tim gives him a wry smile.

"I just ate. Thanks anyway," he says.

"Even if its my treat?" Kon asks. Tim laughs.

"I'll see you Saturday," he says.

* * *

 Tim is wearing raybans with a bright pair of shorts and a hoodie. He's lounging on a deck chair under an umbrella with a milky drink next to him. Kon squints at him from where he's playing ball with Rose, Cass and Cassie. The ball bounces hard on the back of his head.

" _Ow_ ," he whines at them and throws the ball at Cassie.

"You should be paying attention," Rose smirks at him as Cassie passes the ball to Cass.

"Oh you've got my attention, all right," he says and yanks Rose under the water with his TTK.

"Just go talk to him," Cass says as she passes him the ball. He never gets to answer when his ankle crumples from under him with a vicious yank. Rose sits on his shoulders and tries to suffocate him with her thighs. He stands up anyway.

"Traitor," she grunts as he throws her off to the side. She falls and the spray of the water reaches Miguel baking on a blanket. He makes a purple wall between him and the water. Next to him, Raven turns on her front with a sigh. Kon feels an immediate breeze before Bart drops next to him.

"Look who I found!" Bart says.

"Steph!" Cass screeches as she rams the blonde on Bart's left. They both fall into the water. Kon manages to give Bart a thumbs up before getting attacked by Rose. He throws her into the water again before making his way to Tim.

Tim holds a Nintendo 3DS in his hands, fingers moving in a blur. His tall glass of coconut juice ( _with real shredded coconut_ ) is utterly forgotten by its owner. Kon doesn't think Tim even touched it. Kon grabs the drink and downs it in one. Tim pushes his shades up to his hair like a hairband and lifts an eyebrow at him.

"That was my drink," Tim says. Kon leans close and pushes the 3DS to Tim's lap.

"Looks like I owe you one," he says. Tim's eyes get that piercing look that makes Kon feel like he's won something.

Then Tim gives the tiniest huff and pulls the shades down on his face.

"Make it a canned Zesti," Tim says, already nose deep into his 3DS. Kon frowns at him.

"Canned Zesti and a round of beach volleyball," Kon bargains.

"Canned Zesti only and hurry up or Rose will catch you," Tim says. He points to the beach. Rose is playing tag with Bart but they're inching closer to the umbrella. Kon goes to find some Zesti.

* * *

Everyone is squared off for the evening. Kon waves at Tanya as she half-carried Rose to their shared room. Cassie and Cass are talking in the sitting room. Mia is napping on one of the couches, her eyes red rimmed from snorkeling all afternoon. Bart is still out with Jaime and, because its Bart, they are munching on left-over barbecue and green mangoes. Kon passes them by to bring some of that barbecue to Tim because when he offered this afternoon...

_"No, I'm not hungry. Thank you," Tim says. Kon bites into one and moans._

_"Are you sure? They're really good," he says over a mouthful of barbecue._

_"Yeah, I'm sure," Tim says._

...and Kon is absolutely sure Tim hasn't eaten anything since getting on the island. He finds him on the balcony of their shared room, talking to Steph.

"Hey there, battery," Steph says. Kon frowns at her.

"Hey to you too, eggplant," Kon says. She just smiles at him. Tim is trying really hard not to laugh while munching on a salad. A chicken salad. Kon feels faint.

"Tim, Timmy, my man, you picked garden salad over this juicy, meat?" Kon says as he waves the barbecue wrapped up in foil under Tim's nose. Tim dodges and goes back to munching on greens.

"I have a strict diet," Tim says, "No red meat."

"Let me take care of that," Steph says as she makes a grab for the barbecue. Kon floats a bit higher, keeping the goods out of her reach.

"Nuh-uh, eggplant. This is for Tim," Kon says.

"Just give it to her, Kon. I wont eat it," Tim says. Steph nabs the food from Kon's grasp. She gives a whoop before running into the house.

"Weird. You're weird," Kon says. He wraps his arms around Tim and kisses the top of his head. Tim laughs.

"So you say," Tim mumbles. Kon watches him finish his food.

Somewhere in the house, Miguel screams. Kon sees Bart zoom by, getting pelted by purple bricks.

"Wanna skinny dip in the ocean?" Kon says as Tim drinks water from a bottle. Tim coughs and Kon pulls away to helpfully pat his back.

"No," Tim says.

"All work and no play turns Tim into Batman," Kon says. He lifts Tim up and flies him down by the beach.

"Kon! Put me down! Now!" Tim yells.

"Are you sure, li'l chum?" Kon teases and dangles Tim by the water. Tim climbs him and perches on his shoulders like a koala.

"No! Not in the water!" Tim says.

"Did you get bitten by Catwoman while I wasn't looking? First off, wow. Secondly, what the hell, man?" Kon says as he flies in lazy eights on the beach. Tim sits on his back. Bart zooms by them.

"Catwoman isn't really a cat. She's human," Tim says. His arms are outstretched, with his hoodie flowing like a cape behind him. Kon rolls over with his hands behind his head. Tim does a handstand flip thing before sitting on Kon's abbs.

"You're being a very lousy ride," Tim says as he stretches out on Kon, laying his body flat on his, his elbows on Kon's chest and his hands cradling his face. He wriggles as he makes himself comfortable.

"Maybe you were being a lousy rider," Kon teases. He presses his hands on the small of Tim's back.

"Comin'thru.Comin'thru. _MOVE!_ " Bart yells. He runs by them and splashes them with sea water. Kon swerves to avoid Miguel's purple bricks. Tim looks like an angry wet cat but he lets him sleep on the bed, anyway, after they'd both taken a bath so Kon thinks they're alright.

* * *

Nightwing wakes them at ass o'clock Sunday to start their Boot Camp From Hell.

"Gather up, people! Move it!" Nightwing yells. She is surrounded by a cacophony of moans and groans. Kon looks over at Team Bat and silently curses Tim. They are the only ones already in costume and coherent this time of night. Well, duh.

They run around the beach for an hour and then through the forest. Nightwing goads Kid Flash into doing ten laps through all 51 states. Yep, even Alaska, and Superboy squints hard when Kid Flash comes back in half an hour to tell the rest of the team how slow they are. Superboy shares a look with Wonder Girl before they tackle Kid Flash and tie him up with Wonder Girl's whip. The team take turns carrying the squirming speedster through the rest of their run.

Halfway through their run in the forest, they lose Nightwing. Kon starts to worry when the rest of the Bats disappear.

"I swear Red Robin was right behind me," Bunker says, "Is this a test or something?"

"If it is, I like it. It wont take long to track them down," Ravager says.

"Nightwing told us to run through the forest. In and out. She would have said if we were playing hide and seek," Raven says.

"Are you suggesting we leave without our teammates?" Power Girl says.

"Wonder Girl, what's your call?" Speedy says.

"Raven's right. Our objective is to go through the forest. We'll follow the trail till we can't anymore and wait for further instruction once we're out," Wonder Girl says. Her brows crease.

"But what about RR and the others?" Blue Beetle says.

"I'm not leaving without Rob, just putting that out there," Superboy says. Wonder Girl rolls her eyes.

"Of course not, SB, but we have to treat this as a reconnaissance mission until more factors come into play," Wonder Girl says. She looks at Power Girl.

"Power Girl, Ravager and Bunker, you're Team Alpha. Follow the trail. Be prepared to change objectives. Power Girl, you're in charge," she says. Team Alpha makes eye contact with each other before nodding their assent.

"Kid Flash and Blue Beetle, you're Team Gamma. I want you to scout, check if there's any obstacles to finishing the course. You're joining Team Alpha when you're done," Wonder Girl says. Kid Flash holds his hand up for a high-five and runs away when Blue Beetle tries to slap his hand. Blue Beetle curses under his breath as he flies after the speedster. 

"The rest are with me. Team Beta. We'll pursue the missing members," Wonder Girl says. Ravager glares at Speedy in a way that makes Kon's arm hair stand on its end. Kid Flash stops and returns to the circle. Blue Beetle follows him, mutters something in Spanish, and slaps his arm. Kid Flash mutters back.

"Keep your communicators on, expect company and make sure you don't lose each other," Wonder Girl says. Everyone nods to show they understood. Team Gamma breaks from the group first, pursuing the trail on land and on air. Team Alpha follows quick, keeping to the forest trail, their shoulders tense and their eyes alert for any movement. Team Beta sees both teams off.

"Raven, can you detect any hostiles around?" Wonder Girl asks once both teams disappear through the trees. Raven closes her eyes and floats a couple of feet off the ground. Tendrils of shadows dance around her. After about a minute, she opens her eyes and shakes her head before her feet are on the ground.

"There are eighteen people in this forest but none of them are giving off intense feelings of rage," Raven says. Wonder Girl nods.

"Okay. That's good.Thank you, Raven," Wonder Girl says. She turns to Speedy.

"Speedy, how's your tracking skills coming along?" Wonder Girl asks.

"Still not as good as Ravager's," Speedy says. Wonder Girl puts a hand on her shoulder.

"Still better than most," she says and Speedy smiles.

"There are no signs of struggle," Speedy says as she knelt in the dirt, "and the undergrowth all show signs of people going to one direction. Four people, I think."

"Thank you, Speedy," Wonder Girl says. She looks at each of them and says, "Let's get our friends back."

* * *

 

Tim coughs in the crook of his arm.

" _Hey, babybird, you cough one more time and you'll blow this OP_ ," Red Hood's whispers float from his communicator. Tim glares at the bushes concealing... his brother.

"Quit quipping. Incoming, 1 o'clock," Arsenal says from his perch next to Tim. Sure enough, Team Beta stumbles in the little clearing. They set up a protective circle around Speedy as she reads the fake tracks Red Hood and Arsenal laid down. Kon looks at the direction of the branch Tim is sitting on. Then he turns to the bushes that hide Red Hood.

" _Capricorn!_ " Tim yells as he throws a taser ball at Kon.

Tim's call to action drowns Red Hood's muffled curse. Arsenal's arrow flies at Raven. She dodges the arrow but walks right into Red's range. She crumples to the ground as Red Hood's rubber bullets hit her back. Kon hisses as the taser grazes his skin and jumps straight for Tim. Supergirl jumps from the bushes behind Red Hood and lunges for Kon. Tim runs. Arsenal is right behind him. They will converge at the second location.

They get a few meters away from the scene when Raven emerges from the trees in front of them.

"Not so fast," Raven says. Speedy is right next to her, her arrow leaving her bow and heading straight for Arsenal. Tim knocks it aside with his compact bo staff. he flicks the staff and it grows to its optimal length, twirling it around to knock off Speedy's arrows. Arsenal is taking shot after shot at Raven. Her shadows form a shield and swallow the projectiles, then send it back. Arsenal runs and jumps into the trees. One of Speedy's arrow burrows into the ground by Tim's feet and makes a beeping noise.

Tim flips away but not fast enough. The little explosion blinds him. Raven captures him, shadows grasping at his limbs. Speedy shoots at him but she hisses in pain when a rubber bullet hits her hand. Her arrow, a _huge_ tranquilizer arrow Tim thinks to himself, whizzes by his left ear. Raven's shadows slowly cover him. Tim sneezes as he plunges into darkness.

* * *

 

Tim feels a lurching sensation below his stomach and he falls face first into grass. Arms as strong as steel wrap around him. Tim wriggles and twists to get away.

"Stay still," Kon grunts. Tim is not going to make this easy for any of them. He sneezes.

"Ew! Why do you have a lot of snot?!" Kon says. Tim tries to sprint away the moment Kon lets him go but he finds his feet glued to the ground. Kon procures a handkerchief out of his back pocket and wipes Tim's face. Tim sneezes again.

"Uh... I feel bad questioning him," Speedy says. She flinches away when Tim sneezes a third time.

"Are you done?" Wonder Girl asks Tim.

"Yeah, I think," Tim says through the handkerchief. Kon folds the handkerchief over and stuffs it in his back pocket. Tim notices Kon's hand clasped tight on his right elbow.

"What's going on here, Red Robin? Why are you wearing that? Where's Nightwing and Batgirl?" Wonder Girl says. She points to the unmarked military gear Tim is wearing.

Tim stares at her... And stares...

"Hera, why?" Wonder Girl grumbles as she slaps her forehead. Tim sniffed and Kon gave him the handkerchief to blow his nose on. Speedy sighs and starts rummaging through her belt for... something. Tim's not really sure what. 

"Just tell us what you know, Rob, so we can get back to bed before I see the sun," Kon says.

"This isn't really how interrogation works," Tim says, his voice muffled by the handkerchief. Kon mumbles something with a lot of vowels and Tim looks at the sky. It is starting to lighten up. Tim sneezes into the handkerchief as Speedy flips her taser on and off.

"Woah, why are you flashing that around?" Kon asks.

"You're failing this exercise, Kon," Tim says and points his finger at Speedy, "She's got the good idea."

"I really don't want to use this on you, Red Robin," Speedy says.

"Put that away. You're not using that on Rob," Kon says. Speedy raises her brow at him.

"But we need information, Superboy. Especially now that Kid Flash and Ravager have been taken," Raven intervenes.

"And I've been instructed not reveal anything on the threat of death. But you can try anyway," Tim says. He closes his eyes and taps the side of his head. He feels sharp pain on the right side of his brain. Kon holds his hand away.

"Stop that. You're hurting yourself," Kon says. His brows are crunched together and he looks like he is glaring at Tim. 

"Are you okay?" Kon asks. He places his hand on Tim's forehead and yells a word with a lot of vowels.

"I'm okay," Tim says.

"Like hell you are. I'm taking you back," Kon says and Tim is suddenly looking up at the sky. A sharp wind breezes by and Tim shivers. He can feel Kon trying to curl around him.

"I'm cold," Tim says. There are voices around him and his head still hurts. 

"Kon... Kon..." Tim calls while slapping Kon's chest, "There's... pen... left trouser pocket..."

He feels someone rummaging through his left trouser pockets. Someone steadies his leg and Tim grunts when he feels the injection pen bite through his pants. 

* * *

 _I have to stop passing out on him,_  Tim thinks when he wakes up in an air-conditioned room with blinds on the windows. The light is on and Kon is glaring at him. Something with yellow hair attacks him.

"Oh my god, you're awake!" Steph's voice comes out from a bunch of gold hair all over Tim's face. When he looks up, Kon is glaring at the wall instead.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 TBC

**Author's Note:**

> This work was based on [Hummingfox](http://archiveofourown.org/users/hummingfox/pseuds/hummingfox)'s comment prompt: _would you write a story where Kon finds out Tim's asplenic? I'm uncertain whether you're trying for pre-new52 or in the new52 series, but I love this idea of Tim having been injured to the point that he's lost his spleen and there are few stories other there where Tim either has to deal with the consequences of no spleen or the people around Tim learning about the lack of spleen and everything that entails._
> 
> Please comment, specially about the tags. I'm not sure if I tagged enough or too much. I'm still taking prompt requests for Timkon. :]


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